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How The Unexpected Can Make You Feel Like You’re In the Movie JAWS (and How To Deal With Stress & Frustration)

March 10, 2015 By Monica Stone Leave a Comment

Isn’t it the most frustrating when things don’t go as planned?

You know what’s more frustrating though? When you put an insurmountable amount of work into something for it all to disappear.

This used to happen when I worked at an office. I used excel spreadsheets, and I cannot tell you how many times I’d finish a huge report for it all to crash on me.

You’d think it would become easier and easier to deal with the unexpected, but it never is. I would walk away feeling so incompetent that I had to extend a deadline even though it was out of my control. What a blow to the ego.

I don’t have to deal with that anymore since I left my job, but I realized I hold myself to the same expectations. I guess habits are hard to break. 

Last night, I finally finished my blog post, which took me longer than expected, and went to save my draft like normal. 

Then, this happened: I got a WordPress failure warning. 

sucks

I wasn’t too scared though because WordPress is stellar at saving and restoring drafts. I knew that once the page pulled up, I would get a message about an autosave, and I could just revert it back. 

That DID NOT happen this time, my friends!

My page came up blank, and there was no restore option. All of the sudden I had a visualization of being in the movie Jaws. I was all alone in this vast ocean, and all I could hear was..

duunnn dunnn… duuuunnnn duun… duuunnnnnnnn dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dunnnnnnnnnnn dunnnn

My mind kicked up thoughts like, “Are you freakin’ serious?!?!

But here’s the thing. The universe doesn’t care about my schedule and plans. And, the universe certainly isn’t responsible for my happiness. I’m the only one that can create that. 

Then I realized, I doubt you really care if I go an extra day between posts. That was my biggest concern, and I was beating myself up over it.

Man……I’m my own boss now, and I’m still dealing with these issues. Sigh.

Why does it seem like the end of the world?

I know I’m not alone on this. It dawned on me, these expectations are the reason most of us feel inadequate and drown in overwhelm. 

No matter how well we plan, it’s hard to cope when things take an unexpected turn.

Before I worked it all out, I had to take a step back for some reflection.

My Quick Fix For Anxiety & Frustration:

1. I stepped away from the computer. It was just obviously time for a break. 

2. I grabbed my gratitude journal. I wrote down five things that happened over the past week that I was grateful for.

3. I set my timer for 30 minutes and meditated. I envisioned myself back in Twentynine Palms at the Vipassana retreat I attended, and just sat with my eyes closed and focused on my breath. 

(My Happy Place)

Joshua Tree

All of these things together made my heart a little happier, made me a little calmer, and gave me a clearer perspective. 

As a practicing yogi, I know that the good, the bad, and the ugly will always exist in one state. Yoga practice helps us to form the habits to be less reactive, so that the frustrating moments just run their course. 

The more I practice, the more I’m able to catch these negative states in their act, and put what I learn in my daily practice to work. 

Here are some other ways to give your mind a rest, and create calm when your feeling stressed:

a. Take a walk
b. Pick up an inspiring book like the yoga sutras and read an excert. 
c. Clean: do the dishes or laundry. This might take your mind off the frustration. 
d. Call a friend that you can vent to.

The possibilities are really endless.

The main thing to remember is – plans are good to have, but nothing really ever goes as planned. We’re way harder on ourselves than anyone around us. 

Rewrite Your Plan:

Jeff Sutherland, creator of SCRUM, talks about rewriting our plans throughout the day. In terms of work projects, he says humans are awful at estimating time and dealing with the unexpected. His concept is all about creating a plan knowing things will change. Then, as things change – stop, rewrite your plan, and continue on the new plan. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat.

Since so many unexpected things happen – once something throws you off – just re-plan, and recommit. If we know this going in, the pressure’s off. 

 

Homework Time (YES)!

What’s your technique when something happens that you didn’t expect. How do you deal with it when all of your hard work comes crashing down on you? Tell me in the comments!

Namaste,

Monica

Filed Under: Instruction

Monica Stone

About Monica Stone

Monica is a lover of all things yoga, a vegetarian, an avid tea drinker, and never gets sick of soup and noodle dishes. She teaches yoga, practices daily, and runs a Spiritual Book Club in Orlando, FL. She likes to challenge the strict rules of yoga, and makes it accessible for everyone - especially people who suffer from daily life and work stress.

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Hi! I’m Monica

Monica StoneWell hello there! I'm Monica. I'm a yoga & meditation teacher (and junkie). I teach yoga practices that are quick and effective for the busy person who just needs a few minutes of quiet time in their day. Click around and you'll find quick meditation tips for calming the mind to simple stretches to relieve stress and tension. If you are sick of being intimidated by yoga or just confused by all of the different styles out there - then this page is for you. Yoga helps me daily & I know it will help you too! I'll show you how! Welcome to The Yogi Movement :)

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Testimonials

  • Jaime ShearerJaime ShearerYoga Student Since 2012

    Monica is dedicated to her own practice and the true path of yoga - the one of personal experience - which makes her an outstanding teacher. She is warm and easy to talk with, and she allows the student to have their own experience on the mat. She explains postures and breath in ways that are understandable so that the student "gets it." She makes yoga real and tangible in ways that truly serve the student. Work with Monica. You'll be glad you did.

  • Jacob AbercrombieJacob AbercrombieYoga Student Since 2011

    have always wanted to try yoga, but was always nervous. Monica took that fear away and made me feel like i was the only one in class with a room full of strangers. She is able to work with multiple students during the same move and still make it a personalized class for one.

  • Serena JonesSerena JonesYoga Student Since 2010

    Monica has been a highly influential teacher to me. She creates a safe environment for learning and practice. I have always felt grounded in her classes, and she pushes me beyond my own expectations. She inspires and motivates! I can't imagine my life without sharing a path with her!

  • Angela OrofinoAngela OrofinoYoga Student Since 2011

    Monica is a caring, wise, thoughtful, and talented yoga instructor. She has an in-depth knowledge of the philosophy and spirituality of Ashtanga yoga. My previous yoga experience had mostly just been at my local gym. Luckily, last year I found Monica. She has been guiding my practice at least once a week since then. As a newcomer to Ashtanga yoga, Monica made me feel comfortable and had the patience to teach me the basics. She also encouraged me to start an at home practice so that I was able to obtain a deeper understanding of Ashtanga. Monica is always encouraging and lets me know in subtle ways when she feels that I am ready to move deeper into my practice. I feel that the growth in my practice over the last year has been tremendous. Not only do I notice the change in me but others around me do as well. I am so grateful to have found Monica!

  • Sasha TamarSasha TamarYoga Student Since 2012

    I’ve come across many a yoga instructor over the years, but Monica stands out as genuinely amiable, as she glows with an infectious inner light, and highly devoted to and passionate about her practice. Her dedication to Ashtanga as a lifestyle is very clear, and creates for a contagious motivating force. Every time I’ve practiced with her, she eagerly transmits her devotion and passion of Ashtanga and meditation to everyone in class; she makes the most fledgling beginner feel at home, and simultaneously challenges the more advanced students. While I only practice Ashtanga with her, I know she provides therapeutic yoga sessions as well as meditation. And, if her methods of guiding students out of the Ashtanga vigor into the more meditative savasana are indicative of her meditational techniques, I’d recommend her to anyone

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